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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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A lot of people assume pirates prefer to be in the navy.
But actually they prefer the arrrrrrrrmy.
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The salesman at the furniture store told me, “This sofa will seat 5 people without any problems.”
I said, “Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without any problems?”
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What kind of exercise is perfect for lazy people?
Diddly squats!
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3d printers can print guns now!
Not impressed. Had a canon printer for years.
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Patient: When my hand heals, will I be able to play piano? Doctor: Yes, you'll be fine in a few days.
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